Friday, July 31, 2015

Earpiece

2015 07 31 "Earpiece" #OW

An earpiece is a device that attaches to your ear that allows you to hear stuff.

Earpiece looks like a little bean with a long bendy attachment that holds it to your ear, or it just fits inside the ear canal.  It may have a wire or be wireless.

Earpiece sounds like whatever is broadcasting through the unit, whether music, an audiobook, or a phone call.

Earpiece smells like ear wax.

Earpiece feels like hard plastic.

Earpiece tastes like rubber, plastic, and ear wax.

Rhymes with Earpiece: A afterpiece, apiece, B battlepiece, CH chimneypiece, endpiece, F fieldpiece, fowling piece, FR frontispiece, H hairpiece, I eyepiece, K codpiece, cornerpiece, KR crosspiece, crownpiece, M mantelpiece, masterpiece, mouthpiece, N neckpiece, O altarpiece, P peace, piece, pocketpiece, R repiece, S centerpiece, SH showpiece, T tailpiece, timepiece caprice cerise, reese decease, cassis, predecease, cease, surcease atis, m├ętis cantatrice

I can't believe what's coming through my earpiece
You're gonna make me throw up on your hairpiece
You say such random shit you're the epitome of caprice
I guess pullin' this thing outta my ear's the only way to make you cease!

Thursday, July 30, 2015

Grease

2015 07 30 "Grease" #OW

Grease is a slippery substance rendered from animal fat.

Grease looks like an oil stain.

Grease sounds like sneakers slipping on pavement.

Grease smells like animal fat.

Grease feels like a viscous, slippery substance.

Grease tastes like chicken.

Rhymes with Grease: Thais obese fleece geese ambergris, degrease, grease, grece, Greece, verdigris decrease, increase, crease, creese, kris, recrease, uncrease  coulisse, lease, lis, pelisse, police, prelease, release, re-lease, sublease, valise semese nes, nese, Nice, niece

Grease is the word and the word is grease
Grease is slippery and some grease comes from geese
Consume too much grease and you'll be obese
Your pants will shrink or your waistline will increase.

Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Concept

2015 07 29 "Concept" #OW

Concept is an idea or meme.

Concept looks like blueprints or a Power Point slideshow.

Concept sounds like blah blah blah and then a miracle occurs!

Concept smells like some tasty baking in a test kitchen.

Concept feels like have your mind blown by a new idea.

Concept tastes like Reese's peanut butter cups.

Rhymes with Concept: ept, inept adept kept, unkept biblioklept, y-clept crept leapt, nympholept inept pepped accept, discept, except, incept, intercept, intussuscept, percept, precept, preconcept, recept, sept, suscept, transept slept stepped, unstepped backswept, swept, unswept, windswept mammothrept wept, unwept

It's a simple Concept
It came to me as I slept
The floor was dirty and had to be swept
And now that it's clean, clean is how it's kept.

Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Hep

2015 07 28 "Hep" #OW

Hep is in the know or stylish.

Hep looks like Ron Glass on Barney Miller.

Hep sounds like Scatman Caruthers.

Hep smells like French perfume.

Hep feels like being with it and happening, like the cool kids.

Hep tastes like Benjamin and Gerald's ice cream.

Rhymes with Hep: Dieppe hep, not hep kep pep prep demirep, rep cep shep schlep skep D doorstep, F first step, footstep, giant step, I instep, K catstep, KW quickstep, M misstep, O overstep, S sidestep, ST stairstep, step, steppe, T two-step, W one-step

I'm hep
You're not hep
You do the two-step
And trip on the stairstep.

Monday, July 27, 2015

Sheep

2015 07 27 "Sheep" #OW

Sheep refers to an animal used for wool and sheep meat, or it refers to a passive person who follows the leader.

Sheep looks like a four-legged animal covered in white wool.

Sheep sounds like, "Baa!"

Sheep smells like cow dung.

Sheep feels like soft, scratchy wool

Sheep tastes like chicken.

Rhymes with Sheep: enseep, seep asleep, beauty sleep, outsleep, oversleep, sleep, unasleep sneap steep chimneysweep, ensweep, clean sweep, peesweep, sweep, upsweep teap T threap, threep estrepe beweep, outweep, peesweep, weep

You're such a sheep
You make me weep
If  you got lost I wouldn't pull a Little Bo Peep
I'd forget about you and make a clean sweep.

Sunday, July 26, 2015

Bleep

2015 07 26 "Bleep" #OW

Bleep is a noise made to censor objectionable language.

Bleep looks like #@!

Bleep sounds like a beep.

Bleep smells like desperation.

Bleep feels like having tape put over your lips.

Bleep tastes like having your mouth washed out with soap.

Rhymes with Bleep: beep cheap, cheep adeep, deep, down deep la grippe aheap, heap, scrapheap jeep keep, upkeep clepe creep leap, leep, outleap, overleap neap, neep Little Bopeep, peep cassareep, reap, rereap

I won't cuss won't say bleep
Won't call you an ass, won't say you're cheap
Won't call you a dildo fit only for the scrapheap
You won't hear a negative thing out of my mouth -- not even a peep!

Saturday, July 25, 2015

Discontent

2015 07 25 "Discontent" #OW

Discontent is unhappiness.

Discontent looks like the line at the DMV.

Discontent sounds like, "Hey, you!  Get out of the way!"

Discontent smells like a dirty diaper.

Discontent feels like realizing the donut shop is closed.

Discontent tastes like day old bread at full price.

Rhymes with Discontent: A appetent, attent, D detent, distent, E extent, I ignipotent, ill-content, impenitent, impotent, incompetent, intent, K competent, content, M malcontent, miscontent, O omnipotent, ostent, P penitent, portent, PL plenipotent, T tent, U untent, W well-content advent, event, invent, non-event, prevent, circumvent, pseudo-event, sirvente, vent overwent, underwent, went  misrepresent, present, represent, resent

You don't know me or my discontent
You talk shit about me but you misrepresent
My situation's complicated -- I'm not just some malcontent
But if you keep talking trash I'ma shut you up like a window vent!

Friday, July 24, 2015

Magnificent

2015 07 24 "Magnificent" #OW

Magnificent is great or awesome.

Magnificent looks like Farrah Fawcett in her famous swimsuit poster.

Magnificent sounds like The Beates.

Magnificent smells like a hot, sweaty naked chick in your bed.

Magnificent feels like taking a shower with her.

Magnificent tastes like her.

Rhymes with Magnificent: A absent, accent, ascent, assent, B beneficent, D descent, dissent, docent, H heaven-sent, I innocent, K concent, consent, maleficent, missent, munificent, P percent, R re-sent, reticent, S cent, scent, sent, U unsent sklent forespent, misspent, overspent, spent, underspent, unspent, well-spent besprent, sprent, unsprent stent

You're magnificent!
Me, I'm maleficent.
My youth, misspent
I just thought you should know before you give your consent.

Thursday, July 23, 2015

Abstinent

2015 07 23 "Abstinent" #OW

Abstinent means refraining from sex.

Abstinent looks like pursed lips and a glum expression.

Abstinent sounds like groans of frustration.

Abstinent smells like solitude.

Abstinent feels like loneliness.

Abstinent tastes like another TV dinner alone.

Rhymes with Abstinent: anent, E eminent, F fornent, I immanent, imminent, impermanent, impertinent, incontinent, K continent, P permanent, pertinent, PR preeminent, prominent, R remanent, S supereminent, TH thereanent PENT pent, repent, unpent RENT afferent, belligerent, deferent, diffirent, efferent, indifferent, irreverent, preferent, rent, reverent

You say you abstain -- I say, "Abstinent?"
Don't you wonder where your libido went?
What reason do you have to get out of bed?  How you gonna pay your rent?
Give up this abstinence kick, gal -- I say, "Repent!"

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Impediment

2015 07 22 "Impediment" #OW

Impediment is something that blocks your path.

Impediment looks like cones closing off the city street.

Impediment sounds like horns blaring trying to notify the drivers in front to get out of the way.

Impediment smells like garbage from the overturned truck blocking your path.

Impediment feels like wasted time.

Impediment tastes like bile rising in your throat.

Rhymes with Impediment: hereditament, imperilment, implement, impoverishment, imprisonment, increment, instrument, integument, inveiglement, K comment, complement, compliment, condiment, L lament, languishment, lavishment, ligament, lineament, liniment, M management, medicament, meant, merriment, measurement, monument, muniment, N nourishment, nutriment, O augment, ornament, P parliament, pediment, pesterment, punishment, PR prattlement, predicament, premonishment, presentiment, R ravishment, regiment, recrement, relinquishment, replenishment, revelment, rudiment, S sacrament, sediment, cement, sentiment, cerement, settlement, supplement, T tegument, temperament, tenement, testament, torment, tournament, TR tremblement, U unmeant, V vanishment, vanquishment, vehement, W wanderment, well-meant, wilderment, wonderment, worriment

I shall admit no impediment
I won't be bowed by sentiment
I won't stop for a torn ligament
This is my word; accept my testament.

Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Enfeeblement

2015 07 21 "Enfeeblement" #OW

Enfeeblement means getting old and losing control of one's faculties.

Enfeeblement looks like an old woman who has fallen and can't get up.

Enfeeblement sounds like, "Help me!  I can't get up!"

Enfeeblement smells like, "Oops!  I crapped my pants."

Enfeeblement feels like being old and unable to get around so well.

Enfeeblement tastes like cat food.

Rhymes with Enfeeblement: embellishment, embezzlement, embitterment, emblazonment, embodiment, emolument, empanelment, enablement, endangerment, endeavorment,  enfranchisement, encompassment, encouragement, enlightenment, ennoblement, enravishment, entanglement, envelopment, environment, envisagement, establishment, F famishment, ferment, fibrocement, filament, firmament, foment, foremeant, fosterment, FR fragment, franchisement, G garnishment, government, H habiliment, harassment

I asked you what those people meant, not for a discourse on your enfeeblement
I know you're old, but I think you add too much embellishment
Yeah, you're old as the hills, as old as the stars in the firmament
But making me stay here for hours while you ramble on feels like old folks harrassment!

Monday, July 20, 2015

Advertisement

2015 07 20 "Advertisement" #OW

Advertisement is a means of making the public aware of some product or issue.

Advertisement looks like a magazine ad or TV ad.

Advertisement sounds like the volume going up while people you don't want to hear say or sing things you don't want to hear.

Advertisement smells like a perfume sample stapled to your magazine.

Advertisement feels like having your time wasted.

Advertisement tastes like free samples at Costco.

Rhymes with Advertisement: A abandonment, abolishment, admeasurement, admonishment, affamishment, affranchisement, aggrandizement, acknowledgment, accomplishment, accounterment, aliment, ament, apportionment, arbitrament, argument, armament, astonishment, B babblement, banishment, battlement, bedevilment, bedizenment, beleaguerment, bemuddlement, betterment, bewilderment, botherment, BL blandishment, blazonment, blemishment, BR brabbalement, CH chastisement, cherishment, D dazzlement, decrement, dement, demolishment, decipherment, detriment, development, devilment, diminishment, dimplement, disablement, disarmament, disfigurement, difranchisement, discouragement, disparagement, dispiritment, distinguishment, divertissement, document, E excrement, experiment, extinguishment, element, embarrassment, embattlement

I looked up from the advertisement
Face full of befuddlement
Is that what Mother meant
When she said life is full of disappointment?

Sunday, July 19, 2015

Gent

2015 07 19 "Gent" #OW

Gent refers to a gentleman

Gent looks like a dude in fancy dress squiring about the promenade.

Gent sounds like, "Pardon me, but would you have any Grey Poupon?"

Gent smells like high-end eau de toilette.

Gent feels like condescension.

Gent tastes like chicken.

Rhymes with Gent: diligent, dirigent, exigent, indigent, intelligent, intransigent, corrigent, negligent, transigent Kent acquent, eloquent, frequent, grandiloquent, inconsequent, consequent, magniloquent, subsequent B benevolent, E excellent, equivalent, esculent, FL flatulent, flocculent, FR fraudulent, I indolent, insolent, K corpulent, KW querulent, L leant, lent, Lent, luculent, lutulent, M malevolent, muculent, O opulent, P pestilent, purulent, PR prevalent, R redolent, relent, S somnolent, succulent, T turbulent, TR truculent, V vinolent, violent, virulent

None ever mistake me for a gent
I took whatever I wanted wherever I went.
And though my surroundings were never opulent,
At least I didn't blame my neighbor when I was flatulent.

Saturday, July 18, 2015

Accident

2015 07 18 "Accident" #OW

An accident is something that happens without conscious intent.

Accident looks like two cars colliding at an intersection.

Accident sounds like brakes squealing followed by the grinding of metal.

Accident smells like pooping one's pants.

Accident feels like a loss of control.

Accident tastes like blood from your tongue, which you just bit.

Rhymes with Accident: sentient, circumambient, circumfluent, subservient, substituent bent, hellbent, unbent blent, unblent brent D dent, diffident, dissident, E evident, I improvident, impudent, incident, incoincident, indent, K coincident, confident, O occident, PR precedent, president, provident, R resident, S subsident fent Ghent attrahent, hent, contrahent, revehent

I didn't intend to break your vase -- it was an accident
I never had anything against that vase -- certainly no ill intent
If something had happened to your CAT, I couldn't cry innocent
But go ahead and watch the video of me and your vase -- of my innocence I'm confident.

Friday, July 17, 2015

Affluent

2015 07 17 "Affluent" #OW

Affluent means wealthy.

Affluent looks like the Monopoly dude with his monocle.

Affluent sounds like, "Money-Money-Money!  MONEY!"

Affluent smells like crisp new hundred-dollar bills.

Affluent feels like having plenty o- money.

Affluent tastes like champagne wishes and caviar dreams.

Rhymes with Affluent: accipient, ambient, aperient, D diffluent, diluent, disobedient, disorient, E effluent, expedient, emollient, esurient, GR gradient, I inexpedient, influent, ingredient, incongruent, inconvenient, insentient, incipient, interfluent, K confluent, congruent, constituent, convenient, L lenient, M mellifluent, O obedient, obstruent, audient, orient, P parturient, percipient, PR prescient, profluent, prurient, R recipient, refluent, resilient, S salient, sapient

I'm not affluent
But I'm resilient
You're not a good participant
You're too disobedient!

Thursday, July 16, 2015

Fenced

2015 07 16 "Fenced" #OW

Fenced refers to a yard enclosed by a long barrier.

Fenced looks like a prison yard.

Fenced sounds like the cries of pain from a little kid who tripped and landed on the pointy end of a picket fence.

Fenced smells like frustration of the dogs that can't get out and the burglars who can't get in.

Fenced feels like being trapped.

Fenced tastes like non-free-range chicken.

Rhymes with Fenced: experienced, inexperienced, influenced, unifluenced evidenced, condensed, recondensed, uncondensed unfenced flensed, unflensed against, ’gainst commenced, recommenced anenst, fornenst dispensed, recompensed, unrecompensed cross-referenced, referenced, reverenced, unreferenced, unreverenced incensed, censed, sensed, unsensed

I was too inexperienced to break free of a yard so fenced
I knew I would lose when the world I went against
But my captivity made me so incensed
I'd butt my head until I cried, took a brief recess, and then I recommenced!

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Incense

2015 07 15 "Incense" #OW

Incense is a scent made for burning.

Incense looks like a long stick with smoke coming out of one end.

Incense sounds like a quiet flame.

Incense smells like a wide variety of scents.

Incense feels like smoke getting in your eyes.

Incense tastes like something you shouldn't put in your mouth.

Rhymes with Incense: conference, PR preference, R reference, reverence, S circumference B beneficence, FR frankincense, innocence, K commonsense, concupiscence, M magnificence, munificence, N nonsense, R reticence, S cense, sense spence, suspense A appetence, I impenitence, impotence, inappetence, incompetence, incompetents, intense, intents, K competence, O omnipotence, P penitence, PL plenipotence, PR pretense, S subtense, T tense thence

There she sits, burning her incense
Meditating and plotting her penitence
But is this idyllic state just a pretense?
I'm not convinced by all her reverence.

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Abstinence

2015 07 14 "Abstinence" #OW

Abstinence is refraining from doing stuff.

Abstinence looks like pursed lips and frustration.

Abstinence sounds like, "No, thank you, please, it only makes me sneeze."

Abstinence smells like water.

Abstinence feels like want.

Abstinence tastes like water.

Rhymes with Abstinence: immense, commence, mense, recommence, vehemence  E eminence, I immanence, imminence, impermanence, impertinence, incontinence, K continence, P permanence, pertinence, PR preeminence, prominence, S supereminence dispense, expense, pence, prepense, propense, recompense, sixpence, twopence, threepence RENS B belligerence, D deference, difference, I indifference, inference, irreverence

Please don't treat my Abstinence
with Disdain or Irreverence
If you refuse to show me some Deference
I'll show you some Belligerence!

Monday, July 13, 2015

Fence

2015 07 13 "Fence" #OW

Fence is a partition for keeping people out of your yard.

Fence looks like

Fence sounds like

Fence smells like

Fence feels like

Fence tastes like

Rhymes with Fence: defense, offense, self-defense flense hence, herehence whence diligence, exigence, indigence, intelligence, negligence blandiloquence, breviloquence, eloquence, grandiloquence, inconsequence, consequence, magniloquence B benevolence, E equivalence, equivalents, excellence, FL flatulence, flocculence, FR fraudulence, I imprevalence, indolence, insolence, insomnolence, K condolence, corpulence, KW quantivalence, L lutulence, M malevolence, O opulence, P pestilence, purulence, PR prevalence, R redolence, S somnolence, succulence, T temulence, turbulence, TR truculence, V violence, virulence

My dog won't climb that fence
So, how'd she get from her to hence?
Did she jump to escape some turbulence?
Or did the neighbor let her out through some misguided benevolence?

Sunday, July 12, 2015

Experience

2015 07 12 "Experience" #OW

Experience means having gone through stuff.

Experience looks like a grizzled war vet with a thousand-yard stare.

Experience sounds like Jimi Hendrix.

Experience smells like the dinner that didn't get burned this time 'cause the cook learned from burning it in the past.

Experience feels like a familiar happenng.

Experience tastes like a well-made dinner from a chef who has many years in the kitchen.

Rhymes with : A affluence, D disobedience, E ebullience, effluence, expedience, ense, I inexpedience, inexperience, influence, incongruence, inconvenience, insipience, issuance, K confluence, congruence, continuance, convenience, M mellifluence, N nescience, O obedience, audience, omniscience, P percipience, PR prescience, prurience, R refluence, resilience, S salience, sapience, subservience A accidence, accidents, D dense, diffidence, dissidence, E evidence, I improvidence, impudence, incidence, K coincidence, condense, confidence, N nonresidence, nonresidents, PR providence, Providence, R recondense, residence, residents, S self-confidence, subsidence

Dating her was a real experience
Now I know I can meet anyone with confidence
Though now we're over I still thank Providence
If nothing else, she's taught me resilience.

Saturday, July 11, 2015

Attend

2015 07 11 "Attend" #OW

Attend means to go to some event.

Attend looks like the wedding party posing for pictures.

Attend sounds like, "Hey!  Over here!"

Attend smells like a crowd of bored people waiting for the event to be over.

Attend feels like claustrophobia for introverts.

Attend tastes like the chicken they serve at the reception.

Rhymes with Attend: expend, misspend, spend, suspend extend, coextend, ostend, Ostend D distend, I intend, K coextend, contend, P portend, PR pretend, R repetend, S subtend, superintend, T tend trend vend wend Zend

Don't invite me to your wedding -- I won't attend
I don't wanna see you marry some other don't -- I can't pretend.
I'd rather break off all contact -- so this is the end.
I guess it's true -- a guy just can't be your friend.

Friday, July 10, 2015

Shend

2015 07 10 "Shend" #OW

Shend means to put to disgrace or blame, or to shame.

Shend looks like a finger pointed in your face.

Shend it sounds like, "blah blah blah."

Shend smells like rubbing your face in it.

Shend feels like burning cheeks of embarrassment.

Shend tastes like crow pie.

Rhymes with : amend, emend, discommend, commend, mend, recommend, remend A append, D depend, E expend, I impend, K compend, P pend, penned, perpend, PR prepend, ST stipend, U unpenned, V vilipend rend, rerend, reverend ascend, descend, godsend, condescend, scend, send, transcend, upsend shend

You like to blame, you like to shend.
I think this relationship has to end.
I'm just sick and tired of the way you condescend.
I've tried so hard to let you mend, but you're only happy when you have the upper hand.  The End.

Thursday, July 09, 2015

Comprehend

2015 07 09 "Comprehend" #OW

Comprehend is to understand.

Comprehend looks like a light bulb going off.

Comprehend sounds like"Eureka!"

Comprehend smells like Teen spirit.

Comprehend feels like success.

Comprehend tastes like chicken.

Rhymes with : end, gable end, Land’s End, minuend, tag end, upend  backbend, bend, prebend, rebend, South Bend, unbend blend, blende, hornblende, interblend, pitchblende addend, dividend defend, fend, forfend, offend, weatherfend befriend, boyfriend, friend, girlfriend, ladyfriend apprehend, misapprehend, miscomprehend, reprehend, subtrahend kenned, unkenned lend

Heaven forfend! You don't comprehend!
I never said I was from South Bend.
Please don't misapprehend or miscomprehend.
I just want you to be my ladyfriend.

Wednesday, July 08, 2015

French

2015 07 08 "French" #OW

French refers to people from a country in Europe, south of Germany.

French looks like a dude in a beret or a chick with short hair in a miniskirt with stockings, or French toast, or French fries.

French sounds like, "Ooh, la la!  Sassoon!"

French smells like French fries smothered in ketchup -- or catsup if you're fancy.

French feels like sticking each other's tongues down each other's throats.

French tastes like French toast smothered in butter and syrup, maybe whipped cream if you're fancy.

Rhymes with French: bench, disbench, carpenter’s bench, unbench, workbench blench bedrench, drench, redrench flench un-French kench clench, unclench quench, unquench mensch, Uebermensch, Untermensch monkey wrench, wrench squench stench tench entrench, intrench, retrench, trench oldwench, wench

I like that chick -- she's into French
Her tongue works down my throat like a wrench
I'd make out with her on a couch, back seat or park bench
I really like her a lot -- she's my favorite wench!

Tuesday, July 07, 2015

Zen

2015 07 07 "Zen" #OW

Zen is to be chillin' like a supervillain, like Charlie Sheen in Ferris Bueller's Day Off.

Zen looks like me eating a tastee bowl of ice cream.

Zen sounds like Zamfir busting out his pan flutes.

Zen smells like banana cream pie.

Zen feels like relaxing in the hot tub.

Zen tastes like spinach souffle.

Rhymes with Zen: wren, viceraine samisen, Saracen, sen, sensen, Sun Yat-sen Shen sken Sten ten then wen varsovieane doyenne, Cayenne, yen denizen, citizen

You can't faze me -- I'm totally Zen
You can't buy me off for 2,000 yen
'Cause I'm a model citizen!
I'll take care of you like a mother hen
Ask me to name an obscure Asian historical figure, I'll hit you with Sun Yat-sen!

Monday, July 06, 2015

Carcinogen

2015 07 06 "Carcinogen" #OW

Carcinogen refers to something that causes cancer.

Carcinogen looks like a biohazard symbol.

Carcinogen sounds like a match being struck.

Carcinogen smells like cigarette smoke.

Carcinogen feels like slow, painful death.

Carcinogen tastes like toxic waste.

Rhymes with Carcinogen: endogen, exogen, estrogen, halogen, gen, kratogen, nitrogen, oxygen, pathogen, sagene beken, ken madeleine, madrilene, Magdalen A aldermen, amen, B Bushmen, H horsemen, I Englishmen, J gentlemen, M men, N Norsemen, Northmen, P partimen, party men, R regimen, S seamen, semen, cyclamen, SP specimen, T tequmen ballpoint pen, brevipen, bullpen, fountain pen, impen, cowpen, pen, pigpen, playpen, poison pen, unpen

Hands off that carcinogen!
Pick up a ballpoint pen.
Are we not survivors?  Are we not men!
Do as I tell you, then!

Sunday, July 05, 2015

Julienne

2015 07 05 "Julienne" #OW

Julienne means to cut vegetables into long, thin strips

Julienne looks like long thin strips of carrots or zucchini.

Julienne sounds like a knife slicing pulp.

Julienne smells like cold veg.

Julienne feels like hard, cold pieces of carrot or celery.

Julienne tastes like whatever you just cut into long, thin strips: carrots, celery, zucchini, fries, and so on.

Rhymes with Julienne: Darien, ESPN, equestrienne, , cayenne, comedienne, en, n, Parisienne, persienne, Cheyenne, Tyrolienne, tragedienne, UPN, Valenciennes ben, benben, benn, Big Ben chen Ardennes, den, quarenden fen again, born-again glen grayhen, hen, moorhen, peachen, prairie hen, sagehen, turkeyhen, water hen when

I didn't say, "Julie Ann," I said, "julienne!"
I'll chop the veggies -- you just pour the wine 'till I say, "When."
The meat to go with the veggies will be fresh-cooked hen.
Dinner will be ready at suppertime -- that's the strike of six on Big Ben.

Saturday, July 04, 2015

Money Is Make-Believe (first draft) #WGUT

Money Is Make-Believe

Since round about 1980
the game's been rigged for the rich
Good jobs have done a 180
So now a "good job's" maybe diggin' a ditch

Money is make-believe, folks
Money is just make-believe.
If you live in Ferguson, Missouri, or somewhere down in South Car'line
The corporations have been picking your pocket, while spouting 'bout the party line

It don't matter what you call it
Dough or scratch or honey-boo
Don't be a slave to the system
Make your money work for you!

Don't matter if you're a Tinker or a Taylor
Working for that min'mum wage
Navy man or just a sailor
Free yourself from the money cage

Corporations ain't people buddy
Just a tool that's been abused
Rich folks have left us bloody
Now it's time to fix the rules!

Stress

2015 08 04 "Stress" #OW

Stress is a pulling at your nerves due to worry.

Stress looks like a nervous girl pulling at her hair.

Stress sounds like fingernails on chalk board.

Stress smells like flop sweat.

Stress feels like too much adrenaline too much of the time.

Stress tastes like the blood from biting your lip too hard.

Rhymes with Stress: overstress, prestress, understress giantess, poetess, politesse ancestress, distress, editress, executress, idolatress, inheritress, comfortress, ministress, monitress, tress, votress effervesce yes dispossess, possess, prepossess, repossess

Agh!  Ack!  Stress
Like being chased by an angry giantess
Losing my cool, of my cool being dispossessed
Sitting in my easy chair feeling comfortless.

Magazine

2015 07 04 "Magazine" #OW

A magazine is a small periodical usually printed on cheap paper.

Magazine looks like Reader's Digest or Sports Illustrated or Redbook.

Magazine sounds like pages flipping as you scan through.

Magazine smells like scratch and sniff perfume samples.

Magazine feels like paper so cheap the ink sticks to your fingers.

Magazine tastes like paper and ink.

Rhymes with Magazine: latrine, thestreen, treen, vitrine, yestreen atween, between, gobetween, therebetween ’tween  advene, intervene, contravene, convene, margravine, nervine, olivine, prevene, ravine, Slovene, subvene, supervene, visne overween, wean, ween fedayeen, yean benzene, benzine, bombazine, chlorobenzene, cuisine, limousine, nitrobenzene, organzine, zine

It's my favorite magazine
(I buy it just for the articles)
It's a cool scene
(The editors never dangle their participles).

Friday, July 03, 2015

Quarantine

2015 07 03 "Quarantine" #OW

Quarantine is an act of isolating someone, usually to minimize the spread of disease.

Quarantine looks like a miserable person locked in a little room attended by people in hazard suits.

Quarantine sounds like someone singing the "I Got Me a Contagious Disease Blues."

Quarantine smells like vomit and medicine.

Quarantine feels like being sick.

Quarantine tastes like cough syrup.

Rhymes with Quarantine: clementine, KR chryselephantine, quarentene, L lateen, libertine, lovertine, N nicotine, nineteen, O Augustine, P patine, pentene, poteen, potheen, PR pre-teen, protein, pristine, R ratteen, ratine, routine, S sateen, serpentine, seventeen, sixteen, Sistine, cystine, subroutine, T teen, tontine, turbitteen, TH thirteen, U umpteen, V velveteen ornithene, polythene threne

Hey, y'all, come and join the quarantine!
It's the craziest scene that you've ever seen.
We line up and then run around serpentine
We throw up and try to choke down some protein --
Having ebola's the most fun I've had sine I was seventeen!

Thursday, July 02, 2015

Kerosene

2015 07 02 "Kerosene" #OW

Kerosene is a light fuel oil.

Kerosene looks like gas, but lighter.

Kerosene sounds like liquid sloshing around in a container.

Kerosene smells like gasoline but with more of an oil smell.

Kerosene feels like sticky liquid that burns when lit.

Kerosene tastes like something you shouldn't be putting in your mouth.

Rhymes with Kerosene: A arsine, D damascene, E Eocene, epicene, F fantocine, fascine, foreseen, GL glassine, M Miocene, N Nicene, O obscene, overseen, R Racine, S scene, seen, psittacine, U unforeseen, unseen, V vaccine sphene arsheen, dasheen, Capuchin, machine, praying machine, sheen, voting machine skean bescreen, multiscreen, rescreen, screen, split screen, unscreen, windscreen spleen mangosteen, stean, steen A Argentine, eighteen, B barkentine, Byzantine, bottine, BR brigantine, brilliantine, D dentine, duvetyn, F fifteen, Philistine, fourteen, FL Florentine, G galantine, guillotine, J gelatine, K canteen, Constantine, costean

I'm about to blow up like kerosene
I'ma change your life like a moment that damascene
I'll always be around 'cause I'm evergreen
If you betray me I'll cut your throat like a guillotine!

Wednesday, July 01, 2015

Pean

2015 07 01 "Pean" #OW

Pean is a type of fur.

Pean looks like ermine but has gold spots on a black ground.

Pean sounds like fur being stroked.

Pean smells like fur.

Pean feels like fur.

Pean tastes like chicken.

Rhymes with Pean: alpeen, atropine, chopine, Philippine, peen, reserpine, scalpeen, spalpeen, terpene isoprene, preen A aquamarine, Algerine, anserine, B bismarine, butterine, dourine, F figurine, FL fluorine, K careen, kittereen, KL chlorine, M marine, margarine, mazarine, moreen, N Nazarene, nectarine, O oleomargarine, P Palmyrene, pelerine, pyrene, pistareen, R reen, rosmarine, purine, S serene, cismarine, submarine, subterrene, superterrene, SKW squidgereen, SM smithereen, T tambourine, tangerine, terrene, terrine, tureen, TR transmarine, U ultramarine, W wolverine

Chicks dig pean
They'll even settle for wolverine
Some will dye it aquamarine
Give her a fur and she'll treat you like a sex machine.